This Post is off topic

In case you missed the above:

This post is off topic.

Today, I would like to discuss blog awards.

Welcome. To. Facebook? (Thats WTF?)

Yes, blog awards. I have been taking a gander beyond myself lately and have been perusing “other people’s'” blogs, as it were and I have noticed that there is this notion of nominating people for blog awards.

As in: “Hi TruedustFaereyFolk, I just loved your latest post. So I nominated you for the “Lifetime Achievement Biscuit Dunking Award”. You just need to come to my site and collect it.

Firstly – Nominate?

Again – Welcome. To. Facebook?

Nominate does not mean win. I mean, just ask Keanu Reeves – He has been nominated for tons of things, but all he has ever won is scorn. And rightly so.

Example: For best actor in a major motion picture are: Ben Stiller, nominated for his role as Blah Blah in Blah Blah Blah, Michael J Fox, nominated for his role as Blah Blah in Blah Blah Blah and Keanu Reeves, nominated for his role as Neo in The Matrix. And the winner is…NOT KEANU REAVES!

Secondly, why do I need to go to your site to collect it? Huh?

Post it to me.

"scuse? Huh? An Award? For what? The Longest, Most Persistent Fool Award? Wow!

“scuse? Huh? An Award? For what? The Longest, Most Persistent Fool Award? Wow!

Thirdly, what the hell are these things about?

The Liebster Award? Whats this? The Nobel Peace Prize for assistance in helping others with proper punctuation and apostrophe placement? (You’re welcome, dammit)!

The Beautiful Blog Award? One might as well come up with an award for the best ability to misplace Lego figurine heads! I will call it the Gillooly’s Interchange Award. (You can Google it, it’s a thing, OK).

I have decided that I will never accept such an award. They mean zippo!

What I do want, however (and take note Father Christmas), is that bloody elusive blue tick next to my damn twitter account!

That is all.

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