The sacrifices that I make!


In the light of Pravin Gordhan’s latest little money talk and given that next year is an election year, I have decided to heed his advice and do a few cut-backs myself.

Financially speaking of course.

So henceforth, as it were, all deliveries made to Nkandla (that bastion of freedom) containing purchases etc made at tax payers expense, shall be made to the gate and no longer to the front door.

The reason being is that the drive to the front door is long and thus a waste of petrol and tax payers’ hard earned cash.


You got to let me go to his front door. I have his DSTV magazine!

You got to let me go to his front door. I have his DSTV magazine!


So, there it is, Mr Gordhan, my bit for the financial stability of this country.

Please don’t ask more of me!




Lesson in Brutality



Brutality is an all important weapon in the arsenal of a dictator.

Why, one may ask?

Well, brutality begets violence, violence begets fear and fear, in most cases, begets obedience. (In the few cases where fear begets rebellion, I have found that a further implementation of brutality usually achieves the desired results).

It is that simple.

Now, I don’t advocate the use of brutality merely for the sake of brutality, as we are not the Romans (or the US), but rather brutality for the sake of keeping the peace, as it where. I would also advocate the use of brutality so as to get one’s own way, especially during what is called “election times”.

Having an excuse for brutality is of vital importance, as it gives one an excuse to say, when the west points their rich little capitalist fingers at one, that events compelled the use of the army or the police (as the case may be) to quell unrest ahead of some important event, even if that event happens to be the inauguration of the new palatial bathroom. Had one not requested the assistance of the police and/or the army, more people would have died.

Often the west or “developed” nations will criticise the use of brutality as unjustified and amoral. Ignore this. The developed world is hypocritical. Just look at the United States: involved in two major world conflicts, yet their elected ruler wins the nobel peace prize. I fail to understand how they can call Africa a “developing” world and uneducated, yet they do not see the irony of the above. Blows one’s dictatorial mind.

An aside – please note that it is important to have a few suitcases full of dollars and/or title deeds to farms readily available should you indeed require the services of the police or army. This greases the wheels of coercion. (Some times a flashy car will do the trick).

I trust that this has been an insightful revelation and has provided further understanding of the inner sanctum of a dictatorship.