Banning of Prominent Persons

I have decided to ban Nicolas Cage from ever entering our Country.

Why, you may ask?

Firstly, because I can. It’s a perk that comes with the job of being “President”, as it were.

And secondly because I think he is  a twat, a poor actor, an even worse director and I don’t like him.

Fact.

Oh, and most importantly, because when he smiles, his eyes get that glazed “I’m not really here listening to you” sort of thing going.

 

 

I'm what? Banned? What does that mean? For me, specifically?

 

Good riddance.

Oh, and Diane Keaton, don’t you go laughing to hard about poor Nic’s fate. Wipe that smug toothy grin off your face. You’re next, doll!

The Protection of Information and the Establishment of the Media Appeals Tribunal thingy

1. This Act repeals the Access to Information Act (the ATO) in its entirety. (Ie: Any right afforded by the ATO is no longer afforded to anyone, as it clashes with the current Appeals Tribunal, and we don’t want that).
2. This Act also repeals and takes precedent over all and any provision within the Constitution which may or may not affect the implementation and execution of this Act.
3. Any challenge to this Act in the Constitutional Court, will be deemed to be an offence and dealt with in terms of clause 8 below.
4. The primary purpose of the Act is to protect State secrets and information, such as, but not limited to: Official salaries and monies received elsewhere, company financial interests and related tenders, “corporate gifts”, access to State Treasury, acquisition of houses, motor vehicles & companies (legitimately or not), job performance or the lack thereof, who goes where overseas, with whom, does what and purchases whatever and finally, amount of days leave due.
5. The communicated purpose of this Act is to protect the poor. (Note to drafter of this Act – I am willing to go with clause 3 here as it lends a humanitarian aspect to the Act, but I am not sure how. Carry on regardless).
6. The protection afforded by this Act applies only to Government Ministers of the Ruling Party and not that of the Opposition, if any and whoever they may be.
7. The term “Appeal” means nothing, but is merely included to lend the Act some sort of transparency and/or legitimacy.
8. Any person found to have contravened this Act in any way, shape or form will be arrested and detained without trial until such time as they no longer recall the information they wished to divulge.

Ah hahahahaha. I like you. Hahaha "Under the table deal?What under the table deal?" he says. Hahahaha! Now, Bra, this man understands the new Act. Hahahaha